Well today is St. Valentine’s and love is in the air for many couples. A romantic dinner, cards, chocolates and maybe even a proposal or two taking place. Heartwarming stuff. But as we know relationships are ongoing and they take working at. I am always amazed at how amazed my clients are that you have to work at a relationship “but we’re married or living together, isn’t that enough?” Well, no…actually it isn’t.
So my gift to you on this special day are 5 of my Top Tips on how to have a great relationship. The video adds to what I have written below so be sure to watch it.
Top Tip 1. Communicate
Sounds easy? Actually it’s a minefield of interpretation, misinterpretation and reinterpretation. So the key is one small magic word which I’ve revealed in the Video. Watch it Now!
Top Tip 2. Listen
Most times people are listening and hearing according to their own frame of reference. It’s like having personal ear filters which only allow through what a) either we want to hear or b) what fits with our world. In relationship this can be the quickest “kiss-of-death” so learning to really listen is vital. If you don’t understand what someone is saying, ask them to explain again “I’m sorry I didn’t really get that – can you explain it more (expand on it, say it again..etc)”
Top Tip 3. Be Generous
Occasionally just do something for your partner because you love them. So what if you don’t want to see the film they really want to see or go to the match they keep dropping hints about – just do it! Not all the time but if it really matters to them, it’s worth being unselfish occasionally. BUT….the key here is ….do it with good grace. If you are going to be resentful or moody – best not do it at all.
Top Tip 4. Take time for each other
With busy lives it’s easy to forget to spend quality time with each other which can end in drifting apart or leading almost separate lives. It’s why St. Valentine’s day is such a great opportunity to focus on each other – and reaffirm why you’re together.
Top Tip 5. Keep Breathing!
Yes, you did read right. The correct breathing described in the video is essential for staying calm and connected when the relationship seas get a bit choppy.
Happy Valentine’s Day!